Financial Foolishness

Tuesday March 20th, 2012 – Fox Lake, IL

   Sometimes I think I’m being smart, when in fact I’m just a big old stupid goof no matter what I do. I bought myself a spare car when I had a little extra cash, and I thought I was backing myself up in case of a problem. Little did I know it would end up becoming a part of the problem itself.

Storage turned out to be an issue, and I’ve been paying for an outside storage space for the last several months. It’s a little over three miles from where I live, which is a healthy hike but not an impossible one. In a pinch, I can find a way to get there and have a spare vehicle waiting for me.

Or so I thought. I went there last night to check on my trusty steed only to find it with three flat tires and a dead battery. I don’t know what kept the one tire inflated, but my spirits were about as flat as the other three. My main car is making some grinding noises, and I don’t have any cash in the bank to get it repaired at the moment. I thought I’d drive the spare one for a couple of weeks.

I went back today with a manual air pump and some jumper cables and breathed some life back into the old jalopy. It really is a sweet little car, but I wish I hadn’t bought it. That money in hand would have done me a lot more good right now, or at least been a lot more convenient. Too late.

I’m in a financial pickle, as I doubt if I could sell either tin can for what I have in them. Cash is king, and I’m fresh out right now. So is everyone else apparently. There are a couple of deadbeat slippery lowlifes that come to mind who still owe me over $2000 combined from car deals made several years ago, and that would come in very handy right about now. Will I ever see it? Nope.

I love how people like to tell me to ‘just forget about it’ and ‘move on’, but if it were them that were owed that much money they’d pitch a royal hissy fit. I thought I was more than patient with those two turds, but they just continue to ignore the fact that they stole money and never made an attempt to pay me back what they owed. I shouldn’t have trusted them, but I did. I’M the moron.

This is an extremely painful and cold hearted lesson that keeps on stinging, but I really do have to ‘just forget about it’ and ‘move on’. I’ll move on, but I won’t forget. I can’t. They’ve both had more than enough time to pay me back, but they haven’t. They have money for dope, but not me.

I’m the dope for being so trusting, and I feel SO raped. I made both of those deals in good faith at the time, and didn’t get treated the same way in return. How could anyone with feelings not be infuriated? I’ll admit, I’m more than a little steamed – but the problem is much deeper than them.

It boils down to me not being smart enough with my money. I’ve always been free to give it up when I’ve had it, and I thought it would keep coming forever. I’m in a down cycle right now, and it’s not flowing like it has in the past. I’ve never been rich rich, but I’ve usually squeezed by ok.

Now the squeeze is on me, and I’m not in a position of power like I’ve been in the past. I’m out of savings, emergency funds and collectibles to sell. I suppose I could unload one of the cars, but it would be at a loss and only a temporary fix. Universe, I could use a break right about…NOW!

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