Fast Forward

Tuesday January 1^st, 2013 – Fox Lake, IL/Gurnee, IL

   2013 is here, and I don’t know how I know it but I know it’s going to be the biggest year of my life. There aren’t a whole lot of other big years to compete with, but this one is going to prove to be special. For some reason, I feel it in my bones and I’ve struggled too long to not get a reward.

This is going to be my transition year, and I’m going to do all I can to maintain a positive vibe starting from today on. The past is the past, and it’s gone. I’m in a really good mindset right now, and I’m going to look ahead and make better decisions. I think I can still have a productive life.

Today I got up earlier than most comedians I know would on New Year’s Day and drove to the Gurnee Mills Mall to do three full laps of exercise walking. I usually get worn out with two laps, but I wanted to set a higher standard for this year and come out of the box firing on all cylinders.

I did my laps, and when I was through I could barely walk to my car but that’s ok. It’s the good kind of pain, and my goal is to work out at least six days a week the entire year and take my level of health higher than it’s ever been. Again, there’s not much to compete with but it’s worthwhile.

I also started what I intend to be a regular day of fasting each week. I’ve read about it for years, but never tried it consistently. I remember reading in the ‘70s Larry Hagman used to fast one day a week and the thought of it was extremely foreign at the time – especially being a Wisconsinite.

Most of us aren’t used to missing one meal ever, much less one a week. I didn’t eat one morsel of food today, and I drank as much water as I could pour down my gullet. I think we all are very much in need of better hydration, and I’m making it a point to start off this year on a high note.

I’m also interested in meditating on a regular basis. I’m not turning into some ‘woo woo’ kook or hippie type, but spiritual growth to complement physical growth is a perfect fit. I need to grow in all areas as we all do, but it’s so easy to let it lapse and I just refuse to allow for it any longer.

I put some Wayne Dyer on my iPod, and I always love listening to him. He’s got a ton of audio products, and I have quite a few of them. I love music too, but I’m going to use my walks to tune myself into more spiritual things in addition to the music as well. It took me long enough to open my eyes and get caught up to the 21^st Century, but I’m already feeling the benefits of technology.

I also worked on my website plans today, and that felt great to finally get that in motion. I have let it lapse too long, and it’s time to get caught up. I also started what I hope to be a regular tweet on each of my three Twitter names – @dentedcandobie, @schlitzhappened and @uranustweets.

It’s hard enough to do one name regularly, but if I’m going to do it right I’ll make it happen for three. One is myself, the other one for Milwaukee based contacts and the last for King of Uranus stuff. These are all projects I find worth my time, and I’m chipping away at them starting today. I am going to give whatever time I have left my absolute best effort. I’ve farted around for most of my life, and if I don’t put out a full effort pretty soon it’ll all be over. This is my year to let it rip!

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Hot Fudge Hiatus

Thursday July 1st, 2010 – Stevens Point, WI

Here we go with the second half of 2010. Nobody works New Year’s Day, but I wanted to start laying a foundation for everything I want to get done in the next three months and then the next three months after that. Without a tight battle plan, all of this will fall apart.

The first thing on the docket is exercise. No matter what I do career wise, in a nutshell I need to move more and eat less. Period. And, I need to eat different things that don’t taste as good as what I’ve been eating, but won’t make a permanent home in my aorta or lower colon. Fruits, vegetables and water, get used to your new customer. Please be good to me.

I started it all off with an apple, and washed it down with a bottled water. I tried hard to imagine it as an Egg McMuffin and a Pepsi, but it didn’t work. It was an apple and water, but it felt good that I was consciously choosing to have that rather than what tastes good.

I also went back to the Gurnee Mills Mall for my first of hopefully many daily walking assignments. I like it there. The atmosphere is positive and there’s a lot of room to stretch out and lose myself in deep thought as I reflect on life. Nobody ever bothers me in there.

After my walk I went to meet up with Jerry Agar at a hotdog joint that’s about halfway between where each of us live. He’s back from Toronto for the week and we hadn’t seen each other in a while so we hung out and talked about each of our situations. I ordered the chopped salad, and Jerry laughed because we both love their chili dogs. But not today.

Jerry and his daughter Kaelin had hot fudge sundaes, and I ordered a bottled water to go with my salad. I’ve had lots of sundaes and I was fine with it, but they both raised a brow when I passed on one. I used to think life was short and to be enjoyed to the fullest. It may be true, but at this point that sundae would help to make my life shorter. Time for a break.

I then drove up to Stevens Point, WI to see my cousin Leah and her husband Rob. Their daughter Janine has been asking me to come up and visit and today was the day. I told her I was going to be busy for the next few months, so we made time to hang out for a dinner at the Golden Corral. Again, I had lots of vegetables and a water and didn’t go nuts at all.

I know it’s only one day, but I see how it works. It’s not all that hard, but it does take an effort and some discipline to choose to eat the right things, even when the other stuff is all over the place in plain site. I’ve had years of going nuts with it, now it’s time to taper off.

All the way up and back I planned and tweaked and thought of what I need to do to with these next three months. My priority is getting the ‘Schlitz Happened!’ show up and ready  for October 1st at The Schauer Center in Hartford, WI. That’s the main point of my focus.

I also have Uranus Factory Outlet, comedy classes and my comedy career itself to get to as well. That’s a whole lot of projects, and any one could take my focus for three months. This is no easy task, but I took it on willingly. No excuses. Day trip over. Back to work.

Righting My Exercises

Tuesday June 1st, 2010 – St. Charles, IL

Nobody can change the world in a day, so I didn’t try. My goal was to put in as solid of a work day as I could, and I think I did. I got up extra early and my main focus was to get back in the mall and start walking again. I haven’t done it in way too long and I need to.

I know I can walk in my neighborhood and get the same results, but I like the process of doing laps in the mall because it feels like I can measure it better. Gurnee Mills is a larger than normal mall, and it’s mostly on one level. Stairs are minimal, and it just feels right.

I let my mind go as I start walking and ideas start bouncing around like ping pong balls in a tornado. I’ve learned to keep a pen and at least a couple of 3×5 cards with me because when I start getting a flow going, I have to write notes down or I’ll lose some good ideas.

It’s been a while since I’ve had any kind of an exercise flow going and I really thought I was going to die about ten minutes into it. My days of endless youthful energy are finally over, and I don’t see them coming back any time soon. I’m going to have to earn any and all acceptable levels of physical fitness with plain old hard work. I resign myself to that.

I had many years of eating whatever I wanted, and I sure didn’t cheat myself. I’ve eaten some of the best food in North America, and it was delicious beyond imagination. Now I need to work it all out of my veins and colon or I’ll be a statistic a lot sooner than later.

I’m totally fine with it, and am not complaining. I let myself get this far out of shape by not putting any effort into my health for years. I can’t expect to turn into Charles Atlas in a week, or even a year. This has got to be a life long pursuit, even if my life ends in a few days with my heart bursting like a pimple. A half assed effort is just not going to do it.

The weather was great and I drank a water in the car as I drove to the mall. I didn’t have the radio on, and I just thought about not only my day, but what I want to do with the rest of my life. Every facet of my life can use a major overhaul, and I tried to put a razor sharp clear picture of the finished product in my head. It felt great that I even got to the mall.

My goal was to do at least two complete laps, but I was about ready to keel over and die after only one. I’m a lot more out of shape than I thought, and I felt it after that first lap of torture. I tend to lose myself in thought as I walk, but I drifted in and out and felt my heart pumping and my legs aching and I didn’t want to push it. One lap was enough for today.

I was scheduled to meet up with my old radio buddy Steve Perks, who I’ve known for a long time from my days at 95 WIIL in Kenosha. He’s very funny, and a talented radio guy and he’s got the itch to get back on the air. In my opinion, he should have his pick of jobs.

But alas, radio is just as much or more political than comedy and he’s in the same boat a lot of us radio geeks are – not in the good old boy network. Radio, more than any other field I know, is totally about kissing the right ass of the right person who hires air talent.

That’s just how it is, and I’ve never been good at it and neither has Perks. We’ve never even tried to suck up to management, and that’s probably the main reason we’re both not working right now. We’re interested in creating entertaining broadcasts, and management is interested in selling commercial spots to car dealers, restaurants and anyone who pays.

It is what it is, but neither one of us like it. We both bitched and moaned about it over a healthy breakfast at the Golden Corral in Gurnee, my favorite place. There are all kinds of hottie waitresses there, and I focused on eating fruits and fiber and not bacon and gravy as per usual. I forced myself to be good, and it worked. One day down, the rest of life to go.

Let’s see if I can keep it up every day for three months. This is the time of year when it should be easiest, even if I don’t get to the mall. There are sidewalks and even some trails near where I live and the weather will be warm enough where I have NO excuses for not getting my ass out there and exercising. Even in the rain, I need to do this EVERY DAY.

This afternoon I shrunk a substantial number of emails off my pile, and that felt great as well. I took care of the booking issue with Northern Lights Theater and am now rebooked for the week of September 11th. I also was asked to do a private show earlier that Saturday so I’ll end up having a nice week. It’s down in ink, and the booker and I are both in sync.

I also had to submit a press release to some media outlets in Louisville, KY where I will be next week, working at The Comedy Caravan. I made contact with the local newspaper, and they asked for a picture and said they would run something in next Friday’s edition.

The club also asked if I’d record some radio spots, which they’ll run next week. I asked Perks if he’d help me record them, and he said he would. He’s got a studio at home like a lot of radio people do, and he lives about five minutes from me so we’ll do it tomorrow. I know he’ll do a great job, and I think we can do some other recording in the near future.

Tonight I taught a comedy class at Zanies in St. Charles, IL at the Pheasant Run Resort. I’m experimenting with some new exercises for the students and I laid some of them on a nice group of six people tonight. They’re hungry students and I like working with people like that. We were able to get a lot of  solid work done, and it was worth everyone’s time.

I’ve still got a hell of a lot of things undone, but I don’t want to focus on that right now. I made a nice effort today on many levels with many people. That’s what I want to focus on, and keep doing it day after day after day until my entire life has improved by leaps.

One day does not a life make, but many days like this will make life better. I put in my time, and made very good choices. I interacted with quality people, and I felt good about everything I did. How much better can a day get than that? Now I need to keep it going.

That’s always the hard part, but better one day good than just think about it and not do anything to make it happen. I took action today, and I’m proud of myself. I’m starting to put a picture in my head of what I want, and without that I’ll never get anything done.