Living In The Now

Monday July 30th, 2012 – Fox Lake, IL

   One of the most difficult things to do in life on a consistent basis is to live in the now and enjoy each and every moment as much as possible for what it is – a temporary and constantly changing  place holder in time that will soon be gone forever. I think I’m finally starting to learn to do this.

It’s way too easy to complain about the past or pin high hopes on the future, and I’ve done both on a much too regular basis. I guess it’s natural to be like that, but I’m finding that learning to be in the moment whenever possible is kind of like surfing a big wave. There’s a thrill attached to it.

These last few weeks have been a lot of fun, and I’m finding myself really enjoying everything I’ve got going on in my life. I’ve been doing a lot of comedy and radio, and those are two things I absolutely live for. I also have been teaching classes, and I love that too. My energy is positive.

I’m barely squeaking by financially, but I’m squeaking. My car is still running, my health is in a good place and I’m surrounding myself with some wonderful people who aren’t major pains in the ass. It took a lifetime for these circumstances, and they may not last long – but they’re here.

Right here and right now, things are going well. I’ll even go as far as to say they’re going very well – extremely even. I feel like I’ve carved out a very enjoyable life for myself, even if it’s not on a worldwide scale. As far as my personal world goes, I don’t think it could go much better.

Yes, I could be rich and famous and all that – but that’s not what I’m talking about. I’m talking about the delicate balance inside of how life is going on a given day. It’s a vibe, and mine is right where it needs to be. I feel great, and if I can keep it up for the rest of my life I’m going to be ok.

I wish I could explain it better, but I’m liking where I am a whole lot. Yes, I could be making a lot more money and all that but basically I’m doing exactly what I want to do. It doesn’t matter if I’m on the radio in Rockford, IL or Kenosha, WI. It’s the same thrill I’d get in any major market, as is the enjoyment I get on a comedy stage. The buzz is the same no matter where I’m working.

And even though I’ve been frazzled lately, my creative vibe has been very solid. I’m feeling it as far as ideas go, and I’m actually getting a chance to execute them and grow doing things I like to do. I have to believe there are a whole lot of people who make more money than me but loathe what they do and on a deeper level who they are. Not me. I’m delighted with who I’m becoming.

That’s not normal for a dented can. Most of us have been so scorched at an early age it’s really hard to pick out the positives. Our natural tendencies are to look at the negatives, and believe me I’ve been guilty of all that and more. I still may be in the future, but there’s a good vibe brewing and I want to acknowledge it so I can nurture it and let it take over my life. This is what I want.

If I never get famous beyond my circle of friends, that’s how it will have to be. I’ll do all I can with what I have, and life will unfold how it does. Right now, it’s in a good place. I haven’t got a clue how long this groove will last, but it’s here and that’s what life is about – living in the now.


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